It’s an interesting word, but not when it applies to me.
I don’t know… is kinda a mental fear that transform in a tangible thing that is distributed to your body.
So my story is that it has not been even a month since I arrive to Tijuana, to devote full time to my startup, and gradually I been realizing about reality, and this reality is beginning to scare me.
Why do I feel this way?
I remember when I decided to take the first step to quit my job in Guadalajara to come to Tijuana.
And the last thing I remember is that I was pretty confident making that decision… I felt invincible (not kidding).
And now why do I feel so insecure?
Bit by bit I been realizing how things are in the entrepreneurial world about competition, success and failure … I feel it blocks my mind and I feel fear.
I feel fear, pure fear.
(Man! … at least write helps me)
I feel that I’ve slowed down a little work, and do not know if the lack of discipline, motivation or because it is a way of self-sabotage.
But I will not stop trying.
Sometimes I feel a little lonely working without having someone to motivate me. I guess because I’ve always liked team sports where the rest of your colleagues will encourage you and support each other. But being here alone, I think the hardest thing is to fight your own mental demons. But then at the same time I prefer to work a bit isolated because this way I can concentrate.
I have always been so tough with myself, kinda that I can’t make mistakes. But now.. man! I’m scare, and I don’t care to feel vulnerable.
Vulnerability is part of my nature as human bean and as a person that can make mistakes. I have make mistakes when just to thing about them it chills through my body.
But now, I don’t care. I learn and make introspection… analysis. And wonder what did I make wrong, or what would be an alternative to do it. I confess I’m scared about a lot of things in my personal and professional life.
But I’m confident that would not stop me to continue to pursue my dreams and goals.
So… to be scare and continue!!